I can what I choose

(This piece was written on March 31, 2015)

A friend sent me a link to the Deepika Padukone advertisement for Vogue, seeking my views on yet another ‘breaking the internet’ video. The first thought on my mind was whether he (or for that matter the 12300 odd who have already tweeted to #mychoice) would have even watched the video if it was filmed on Bhumi Pedneker. Actually, she would have had a stronger reason to do this, probably to promo her film.

Ít has become fashionable to call on women to accept their body types. Svelte celebrities, living on carb free, closely supervised diets and exercise regimes are falling over each other (encouraged by an unimaginative media) to advice us to love and to be ourselves. The only issue is that the ladies feel the need to essay such good advice while showing that extra bit of cleavage or flashing the size zero, leggy look. It is equally ludicrous, when some of these ladies claim to be ‘foodies’ and are seen on TV tucking into greasy street-side food and claiming that they can’t keep-off such delicacies.

Surprisingly, there were more ladies out there; than men, commenting on the film, like all of them were screeching ‘liberated’. I wish I could ask how many of them are mothers of teenage children and if they are do they seriously feel that good body type is only essential for girls, today. Ask my sixteen year old boy, who is working on his abs and bicep curls. Who is just in that gawky age when he is shy to be seen bare bodied because body hair is no longer fashionable. Have we even noticed that the number of men in parlours, seeking anti-tan facials, waxing and hair straightening, are growing in numbers. The subtle messaging is success goes with and actually is ‘looking good’.

The call for comfort with body type (read size) goes with the cry to dress as per choice. What is espoused is that my dress must be accepted as a sign of rebellion. Is this new to youth? Have we not over generations had this battle of what is right or wrong dress code? Have we not seen bankers revert from dockers to lounge suits, following the global recession? I am reminded of an evening at an office conference, where the dress code read informal. A male colleague of somewhat generous proportions decided to show up in knee length shorts and a hugging round neck T-shirt, not appreciating the fine line between casual and informal. As his colleagues we found that a little difficult to handle, same as a dealer in Begusarai would react if I went for a meeting in my jeans. It might just be pertinent to point out that Deepika, herself, was seen in a very prim and proper white churidar kurta when NDTV hosted her for their talk show on depression.

As if body type and dress of choice was not enough to claim ‘empowerment’, the film moves on to claim sexual freedom. Pooh-poohing the need to remain committed in relationships, it suggests that that an ideal relationship is one where the man doesn’t question choice, number of partners to right to ‘come home at any hour’. Would the same freedom to a man liberate us more? How many women out there would be comfortable allowing the same space to their partners? Would we really say it is liberating or a sure route to rejection, depression and psychiatric intervention?

I puzzle over this male bashing and in-your-face need to express my rights as a woman. May be it is my co-ed schooling or the all-male world in which I started my career. A time when gender-diversity was not yet corporate jargon but Delhi for night travel was just as unsafe. Or maybe, I was just lucky to have a father a generation ahead of his time, who never used the phrase ‘you can’t because you are a girl’

The 3Ms Challenge – what ails gender diversity in senior roles

A while back  Flipkart was in the news on a subject that should bring cheer to young ladies embarking on a career. They announced 6 months of paid maternity leave, followed by upto  4 months flexi working hours and the option to take a further one year break without pay. This follows an announcement by Citibank, India, offering women employees a childcare allowance of Rs 1.32 lakh per annum towards day care services. Such measures are important building blocks towards correcting the gender diversity ratio in senior roles

Over the last few years, I have been engaging with some Corporates in the city towards developing women for leadership roles. In some sectors like banking and IT at entry levels the proportion of women is as high as 30 - 35% but as one moves up the experience curve the percentage goes down. The most challenging years are between 25 and 32 years  when these ladies silently drop out (while their male counterparts compete to move up the corporate ladder).  As succinctly put by an HR expert – Mobility, Marriage and Motherhood are the 3 Ms limiting working women.

The mobility issue begins, many times, well before marriage. In marketing, I have had requests to speak to parents and seek permission (read take responsibility) to allow a woman officer on tour. Recently, a young colleague left to join another organization in an HR role, assuming there would be no travel. On her first day into the job, she was asked to get ready to visit the branch offices. Matters were escalated to the point of ascertaining whether this requirement was clarified in the recruitment process and she finally had to leave! Interestingly, I have also experienced situations of complicity between mother and daughter, where the latter has travelled without the father knowing it is an official tour.

In every Organization where I have worked, there has been at least one very good lady that we have lost to marriage. Funnily, I have not sensed pressures from in-laws-to-be but clearly the lady has looked forward to giving up her job, getting married and settling down. This I attribute to unclear goal setting and lack of visibility of career and growth options within the Organization
Of all the three, probably Motherhood is the most complicated. Most ladies continue at their jobs almost into the last week, cheerfully seen through with the baby shower and friendly advice from colleagues. The problem starts when they resume work after the maternity leave as many assume the task of child rearing will be happily adopted by parents or parents-in-law. However, the reality is that, as long as the mother is at home, the primary responsibility rests with her. The minute she returns to work, the grandparents realise that ‘joy’ has turned to ‘job’. That, companies are recognizing this need and responding with creative options should only build the numbers in senior roles.

While these actions are important, are they also adequate? Talking to many young mothers, I have a conviction that it is most times a clinical problem of postpartum depression, rather than any insurmountable issues at home. Unfortunately, this aspect is not correctly diagnosed by doctors and the family. In our society the act of motherhood is assumed as a reward in itself. There is a fundamental assumption the new mother should be happy and feel fulfilled. A state of hyper anxiety often goes unnoticed and the mother remains convinced that calling to check on the baby once an hour is normal.

At the heart of all this lies the need to share experiences and guide these young ladies to rise above the 3M challenge.  Organizations could do a lot by creating the environment for their women executives to network. Provide them the opportunity to meet other women who have been there, done it all and have contributed more than meaningfully to the organizations where they work.

A twist to the simple Chiwda

On a winter afternoon, with temperature hovering around 9. Degrees, I am travelling through Champaran district of Bihar, headed towards Motihari. We are running behind schedule and it is that important question of whether to stop at a Dhaba and grab a bite. Our CFA comes to the rescue and whips out 3 sets of stainless steel boxes. Each set has one box with Chiwda (flattened rice), muri sev and the other containing a very dry mutton preparation including kaleji (a piece of liver). Out comes a newspaper to use as napkin and luckily I am carrying a dry hand wash and paper tissues. Resting our lunch on our laps and on road that would put craters on the Moon to shame, we silently and hungrily munch our way through. Undoubtedly one of the best mutton preparations that I have had. His driver come cook shares the recipe. The meat is first boiled and drained. Then fried in ghee with essentially salt, little dry masala and mainly chillies. A meal I will remember for many years after I have forgotten the stiffness from this bone jerking ride

Tech Charging Dealer Conferences

In traditional Marketing, dealer conferences remain an essential motivation tool. You start off as a marketing officer and cut your teeth with your first real challenge in mobilising such a conference. Over the years, as your role changes you move away from the nitty-gritty, only to approve the program flow and budgets. In between you carry a host of poignant to hilarious memories. The ritual is to sit, with the team, after such a conference and bring out the raconteur within ourselves.

My very first assignment as a management trainee was to mobilise 300 dealers from across the country to Nepal. In the mid-eighties this was "foreign   tour" for an auto component manufacturer ( though these days for dealers across industries it can be nothing short of Alaska or the World Cup in Brazil). The format was fairly simple with a half day conference session, some sight seeing, the essential Corporate film and putting together the Bosses' presentations. You worked directly with your advertising agency, the hotel and travel agent and practically camped in office for a full month before the event. No formula event managers making a pitch with show reels of what they have done for your competitors and other FMCG or Telecom giants

The dealer confirmations were the first challenge. In the days of circular dial phones and poor telephonic connectivity, countless hours were spent trying to connect on STD and making sense of long telexes. I would end the day with an aching finger from dialling and tired feet running up one floor to check the nth revisions to dealer lists pouring in from 18 odd branch offices on the teleprinter 

The Corporate film and senior's presentations had its own set of challenges. You would sit around drinking several cups of coffee with your agency, only to be called past eight in the evening and having the slide matter or the script changed. So what's the big deal, our new age marketing officer would ask. Well, both presentation and film would be put together on 35 mm slides and each slide had a little over a 24 hour turn around window. As the conference deadline grew closer, you finally had your agency take the last edit call but not before you the poor officer had lost some hair and shouted yourself hoarse. Bosses over the years have not changed in their finicky attention to detail on such matters, thankfully the technology has changed to handle on-line edits! 

A 35 mm slide projector could be like a bad dream remembered for many years. This is one space I found Murphy work overtime. Invariably, that one senior who had the longest presentation would also be the most finicky in the lot. In our case it was our R&D Chief. His technical slides, always carefully numbered would see a sequencing change and or additions after each presentation round. You would stay up late putting it in place and then have to walk him through the lot just before breakfast. After all this, the carousel would jam or for some odd reason (maybe for luck) there would be one important slide upside down.

In retrospect, I believe, our seniors in those days had some misguided understanding that dealers participated in such events to stand educated on the company and its products. I have learnt, over the years that some dealers still do - a small minority.

Thankfully, things began to change in the early nineties. Probably agencies realised the phenomenal time involvement and moved to a facilitator role between the emerging event management companies and the client. It was as recent as 2015 when we had a reputed Travel Agent also bring in their event management arm (outsourced) and provide an end- to- end experience

Change has defined everything we do at these events now and competition within the professional event management companies are charging up the show with innovations. 3-D invites are passé, move over for that micro video invite on WhatsApp. Corporate story is now beamed on laser or giant LED screens. Your airlines could welcome your dealers on board with a personalised branded cup cake. Lamp lighting is virtual and not a struggle on stage with soggy cotton bits that refuse to light. No heavy podium and microphones - you now have practically invisible microphones that make you feel like Shah Rukh at a film event. Finally,  accept that your dealer only comes for the entertainment and give him that heavy duty Bollywood. A Salman or Katrina - budgets permitting or a dance troupe in Bangkok or Colombo dancing to Baby Doll or closer home the Beat Busters - content remaining the same.

The singular thing I miss in all this change is the after-party with your Agency team. That time, when you sat together, and laughed over the previous month's tension and congratulated yourselves on those narrow misses. It forged a bonding and more importantly a deep understanding about the company, products, production processes, network, business results, strategy. In short, everything that remained crucial to continuous ideation and not each campaign being a discrete event that needs to start with a written brief.